Not many people are using xanga anymore. That is sad, because I would much rather spend my “vegging time” reading over meaningful blogs instead of random fb updates. (I mean, who really cares if your virtual farm lost a cow, anyway???) Oh, well, I guess for everything there is a season. (And yes, I’m aware that it is rigged now so that I could update my fb with my blog entries if I wanted to, but I don’t really want to do that. I guess I feel like if someone really wants to see what’s going on in my life, I want it to take a little effort.)

VBS went GREAT! We made it through with great weather, great workers, and great kids! We had 3 families that we met at VBS come back to church the next day, which was really encouraging. Now the key is continuing to follow-up with our VBS participants who are un-churched.

Last week we were pretty much in “VBS Recovery Mode” all week, so I just kind of chilled out with the kids all week! This week has been kicked off with several meetings regarding the children’s ministry at our church. There are definitely some decisions to be made due to losing some of our leadership and the fact that trying to minister to kids in a theater has presented some un-foreseen challenges that need to be addressed.

I’ve been asked to make some commitments to our children’s ministry and am taking a week to pray about it. I really want to do it on one hand, and really DON’T want to do it on the other hand! I tend to kind of be a “Yes Woman,” I can’t remember the last time someone asked me to do something in church when I have said “No!” Even when I have firmly resolved to say “no,” when I’m put in the situation where people are asking me, resolve goes out the window. This isn’t healthy.

If I agree to do what I’m being asked to do, that means that it will create more work for someone else because they will have to do the jobs that I am already doing. (I KNOW that I cannot do both!) Although the new job would put me working with older children (right now I’m working with preschool, and I prefer older children), it would also put me on more of the administrative side of ministry, which although I am good at that, I miss having actual ministry contact with children. It would also make the VBS planning period next year even MORE stressful than it was this year (due to doing two jobs at once), and this year was VERY stressful!

Although it’s nice for me to feel needed, I have to realize that God does not need ME to carry out His plan. So even if it looks like I’m the only one qualified to do it, if I’m not feeling led to take the “job,” I don’t need to take the job. God is perfectly capable of raising of the leader that He wants; He can make a skeleton walk if He wants to!

Not to mention my 2 beautiful children! One of the advantages to moving here is I didn’t have to work at church anymore and could focus on being a mother. If I take this position here, even though it is not paying, I would be pretty much committing to working about as much as I was last year. Although sometimes I go crazy here with the kids all day and I really like to be able to contribute to the outside world, I feel like I am already doing that with what I’m doing at church now. I’m not really being a great mom if my kids are ALWAYS having to entertain themselves to that I can do my all-important “work.” Plus, Ava is getting older, and she’s needing more to stimulate her and teach her things. A by-product of me staying home is we won’t be able to afford preschool until voluntary pre-k, which is still a good two years away! On the flip side of that, most people in our church who are eligible to work with children are working full time AND trying to be parents.

So this is just a few rambles on what’s going on in my mind right now. I tried to be vague enough so that if anyone from my church comes across this, it won’t really tell them that much. However, my reading audience has dwindled down considerably, so I feel kind of safe!

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4 thoughts on “

  1. Hm, def. pray. If you don’t feel God leading you to do it, don’t look at it so much as you saying no to a ministry. It’s more of a “waiting for your yes moment.” haha. πŸ˜‰ If you don’t feel Him leading you to it, there could be a reason — He’s not. haha. If He hasn’t called you, trust He has called someone. That doesn’t mean you should step in and take it just because you’re qualified. Nope. It means you need to trust God with it and wait for Him to reveal how He wants you in all of this. It sounds to me like what you were doing may have been working well for you. Beats me though. I’m not you or God. πŸ˜‰ hahaBe praying for me, girl. I’ve got some unnecessary stress dealing with the move when I can move into an apartment. *sigh* I can’t seem to win for losing. haha. ;P But yeah. I could use some prayer and peace in that area.I hope to be able to get everything done that I need to get done by this weekend! Say a prayer for that too. πŸ˜‰ haha. I am mainly going to be taking my clothes, and a couple boxes… of little decorations (pictures), and items (notebooks, books, etc). So, yeah. Waiting to move the big stuff until I find an apartment. Gotta seek God’s will out for when He wants me to find one and quite living with my sweetie’s grandmother. Hm. We shall see! I’m kind of nervous about all of this. hahaCan’t wait to see you guys this weekend! What are you all coming up for, btw? :)<3, ~*Akarui Mitsukai*~

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